Have you ever had an experience when the Spirit spoke to you so intensely that the words undeniably branded on your soul? You could never deny them?

14 years ago, the Spirit branded my soul.

With an intense heat, the Spirit told me,

You have a story to tell.

A story? What story?

I did not have a story. Okay, I did not have a story worth telling. Nothing in my life was exceptional or out of the ordinary.

What story was I supposed to tell?

Shortly afterwards, I got sick. An infection that quickly spread through my body and organs, immune to antibiotics. As time went forward, so did the infection. If we couldn’t find a solution… soon, the outcome would not be good.

But my doctor found a solution. My life spared.

This clearly had to be my story, right?

Why did I feel like I couldn’t talk about it then?

Time again moved forward, only this time instead of an infection, my husband and I discovered our infertility. We could not have our own biological children.

Was this my story?

Again, I tried, but knew this wasn’t the right story to tell.  

I guess there was still more story to come. And come it did…

• Failed Adoptions.
• The birth and adoption of our oldest son!
• Being contacted by his birth-mother with the opportunity to adopt again; only the timing was bad and there were high chances of medical problems for the baby.
• The birth and adoption of our second son!
• Extreme health problems and several near-death experiences of our second son.
• PTSD from those times leading to debilitating panic disorder and other Mental Health Conditions for me in the aftermath.
• The development of many special needs and disabilities in both of our children.
• The development of chronic life-changing health problems.

Each time I was sure, I finally had my story. I began sharing my experiences, but as time went on, I knew something wasn’t right. None of these were the right story to share.

This past year, as my family’s latest story progressed, a severe new medical condition for my oldest son, I continued to feel the burn of the spirit telling me I had a story to share.

In a moment of weakness, I prayed… complained… to my Heavenly Father, asking how many more experiences I needed to go through to find my story. Hasn’t it been enough?

The Spirit once again blessing me with words that branded my soul.

It isn’t your story you’re telling.

Wait? Not my story? Whose story am I supposed to be telling then?

His.

As I began looking back over these 14 years, these stories, I realized there was a deep connection between every one of them.

Him.

Jesus Christ.

The reason I made it from one story to the next; able to tell the story.

The reason my family is where we are today.

The reason, notwithstanding all the challenges, our life is full of love and joy.

So, today I have a story I need to tell.

The story of my Jesus.

The best part about this story… He isn’t only my Jesus. He is yours too.

So, when I talk about how He is ever-present in my life, always providing love and support. Or how no matter where I am or what story I am living, He is there too. When I promise that there is a peace and joy that He provides me, even in the darkest of my days. I am not only talking about my life, but about your life, too.

I am excited to tell His story.

There is a lot to tell and will take me a while to share it all. Especially since each day He keeps adding more good things to the story.

It will all come down to one thing. He’s there.

Have you noticed Him there? What can you tell me about the story of our Jesus?

Have you ever watched as two magnets forcefully fling together as they draw close to one another?

My son loves magnets. We have hundreds, if not thousands, of magnets all over our house. You can almost constantly hear the “cling” of two magnets snapping together.

It took a while, but I have learned to love this clinging sound.

You see, while reading a book with my son about magnetic force we learned that two objects containing charge with the same direction of motion have a magnetic attraction force between them.

I was struck with the similarity to a scripture I had just read in the Doctrine and Covenants:

“Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you.”

Just like a magnet, if we actively (don’t forget the fact that motion is involved) push our spirits towards the Savior, He will also actively push towards us. Forcing us together. Allowing us to cling to Him for greater strength.

Now each time I hear a “cling” I ask myself what is something I can actively do in that moment to draw closer to the Savior; knowing that as I work towards Him, He will also work towards me. And just like our many magnets, I will become stronger when clinging to Him.

What can you do right this moment to actively draw closer to the Savior?

I promise as you do, He is drawing closer to you too. The closer you get I promise you will find strength in Him. Strength greater than even the strongest magnet.

I have always loved the story of Enos.

Like many, I hear Enos and my thoughts go directly to prayer.

The man who prayed, no wrestled, all through the day and all through the night. Prayers for himself, his people, and even his enemies. Prayers so fervent and so faithful that he heard the voice of the Lord and granted the desires of his heart.

One part of Enos’s story that has always stood out to me, was the reason he desired to pray in this manner.

His father. We learn that his father taught him concerning the Lord and eternal life.

While studying this story and about his father who taught him of the Lord, I found one short line that I had never noticed before.

Enos 1:3 -4

…the words which I had often heard my father speak concerning eternal life, and the joy of the saints, sunk deep into my heart. And my soul hungered…

And the joy of the saints.

His father taught him important principles. And he saw the joy these principle brought into the lives of those living them.

Their joy made him hunger to have this in his life as well.

We can teach others. We can share the words of God. But we must not forget to share our joy.

Everyone can do this! There is nothing holding you back. You can be the one to show others joy. You can be the one who makes this joy sink deep into other’s hearts. You can be the one to help others hunger for the joy of the Savior in their own life.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf

May we all seek and find the higher joy that comes from devoting our lives to our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son

1. Like using eclipse glasses to experience an eclipse, we can experience the fullness of the Son through the spiritual lens of the Holy Ghost

We are recommended to use eclipse glasses to safely view and enjoy an eclipse. It is also recommended to look to our Savior with the aid of the Holy Ghost. The Holy Ghost provides a safe and sure knowledge of the Savior and allows us to see details of The Son, Jesus Christ, we wouldn’t be able to see without it’s aid.

2. Just as each eclipse appears differently depending on the time and place, we each face moments of darkness at our own times and in our own ways.

In 2017 I experienced a total eclipse, but today I only experienced a partial eclipse; while others had the opposite. We will have moments in our lives that it feels like darkness is creeping in. We will have moments when we feel overcome by darkness. But the amazing thing about that darkness is… the power of the light is still always brighter.

3. The Sun/Son has the same amount of power in both a partial and a total eclipse.

Whether we are viewing a partial eclipse or a total eclipse we wear glasses to protect from the power of the sun. Whether we are dealing with small shadows or total darkness in our lives, we can still be sure that the blinding glory and power the the Son will be able to shine to our hearts.

4. You have to look to see it.

Whether it is because of work, school, a busy schedule, or even a lack of desire; many people miss the beauty of the eclipse. Distractions and lack of desire also keep many people from seeing the beauty of The Son. He is there, but if we don’t look we will miss Him.

5. The Sun/Son has a greater impact on us when we are in the dark.

You might wonder why it is more dangerous to look at the sun during an eclipse, especially if it has the same power as it does every other day. A scientific answer is that the UV radiation from the sun doesn’t decrease much during an eclipse, but the amount of visual radiation (light) does. This causes your eyes to dilate more than is normal in sunlight allowing higher than usual UV radiation into your eyes. In comparison, when we are living in spiritual darkness we open ourselves up more readily to the Son; allowing Him to have a greater impact on our lives.

By Dorine Otinga- Nairobi, Kenya

The day Nathaniel Senior left this world, a piece of my heart shattered irreparably. I vividly remember it was 7/7/2021. This date is my father’s birthday as well.

It’s been three years, but the pain still feels as fresh as if it happened yesterday. Losing a child is an agony that seeps into every corner of your being, leaving you hollow and broken. I never imagined such a loss, but life had other plans.

Many are the days I wanted to share this story with the world. But every moment I think about jotting something down, I get scared. Scared of crying forever due to grief. 

Today, allow me to pen this down and share the faithfulness of Christ in my life.

A New Journey into Marriage

My journey with Nathaniel’s father, Elishamah began on a bright September 2020. We exchanged vows filled with promises of love and devotion, blissfully unaware of the trials that awaited us. 

We loved each other dearly and looked forward to starting a family together. We chose to put Christ as the foundation of our marriage. Every morning and evening we knelt and prayed together. We knew that this was our only hope. We still do it to date. Sometimes, we fast as a family.

Three months later, the news of my pregnancy filled our home with joy and anticipation. We dreamed of cradling our little bundle of joy, counting down the days until our lives would change forever.

My husband held my tummy every day and prayed for our baby. I believed it would be a boy and my instincts were right. I enjoyed his little kicks every day. He must have been a playful and cheerful baby.

A Sad Reality Hits My Home

After nine months, I was ready to hold the first fruit of my womb. I waited for the labor pain and one morning it came. I woke up at 4 a.m. with a sharp pain in my back. I remember I was so tired the previous day. 

Before we went to sleep, my husband had asked me whether the baby kicked that day. As I was trying to remember, he held my tummy. Yaay! He kicked so hard that my husband could feel it. We slept and that’s how I woke up the next morning with pain.

When we reached the hospital, the doctor examined me before the admission. She looked worried as she hurriedly tried to look for the baby’s heartbeat. My husband was a medic too and was worried.

“When did you feel his kicks?” She asked.

“Yesterday before going to bed”. I replied.

“Please do an ultrasound.” She said.

We went to the ultrasound room. I looked at my husband but he kept staring on the floor. 

“What is the doctor trying to say? Do you mean we could have lost the baby? I need to understand.” I said.

By that time, I was quite confused.

“Let’s wait for the ultra sound sweetheart.” He said.

It was clear he didn’t want to talk. I knew something was wrong and asked God to give me strength and take control.

Confirmed!

I didn’t know fate had a cruel twist for us. Our world came crashing down. The hospital corridors echoed with the sound of our shattered hopes as the doctor delivered the devastating news after the ultrasound. There was no heartbeat. Nathaniel Senior had left us before he even had a chance to enter this world.

In that moment, time stood still. The pain was suffocating, threatening to engulf me. But amidst the darkness, a flicker of hope emerged. Clinging to the fragments of my shattered faith, I whispered to God, begging for the strength to endure the unbearable.

As I lay in the hospital bed, grappling with the enormity of our loss, I found solace in the quiet moments of prayer. Through tear-stained eyes, I poured out my heart, seeking comfort in embracing a higher power. 

In the depths of my despair, I held onto the belief that even amid tragedy, God remained steadfast.

The Painful Labour and Agony

The doctor in charge told me that I would have to undergo a normal delivery. I didn’t want that. I feared the pain. I wanted a quick surgery and go home to mourn in peace. All the nurses and hospital staff insisted that I should endure the pain of a normal delivery. This was to help me heal faster and maybe get another baby sooner.

The Inner Voice

Despite the pain and grief, I felt an inner voice assuring me that all would be well. I kept praising God for who He is. I told God that He was still the God who was good during the good times. 

I still felt he hadn’t forsaken me. No. Not even for a minute. I loved my God so much. I asked him to save my life and give me strength. After 15 hours of labor, I finally delivered my sleeping baby boy.

Go Well Baby

I felt so emotional when I made the final push. Three nurses assisted me. They looked at me with a lot of compassion. I saw one of them cover my baby. We had vowed with my husband that we would not look at him. Yes. We didn’t want to see a cute baby that we would not carry home.

I requested the nurses to cover him well and not to show him to me. They said he was cute and begged me to look at him. I was adamant. I looked at where he was lying and asked him, “What happened to you baby? I am sorry”.

My baby was buried the same day with the help of my Bishop, my family, and a few church members. I am grateful for this. I was too weak to attend the session so I remained in the hospital and preferred that.

Dark Days Ahead

The days that followed were a blur of grief and anguish. Each moment felt like an eternity as I navigated the treacherous path of healing. I dreaded my bedroom so much. It was the place that reminded me of him most. 

I took all his clothes and little basin and hid them very far. I didn’t unpack anything. I would use them when the next baby came. Of course, I had faith that Nathaniel would come back.

My Healing Journey

Gradually, amidst the pain, something miraculous began to happen. I discovered a resilience within myself that I never knew existed. A strength born out of the depths of despair.

With each passing day, I found the courage to face the pain head-on, allowing myself to feel every raw emotion that threatened to consume me. And in doing so, I began to find glimpses of peace amidst the storm. The Holy Spirit guided me, urging me to find joy amid sorrow.

I also found solace in speaking to other bereaved women. I told them how I felt and what hurt most. 

My Family Was There For Me!

My mum was my pillar of strength. She called me daily and told me she prayed for me. I cannot forget my husband. He endured so much. He kept a brave eye on me, though I knew he was hurting within. He took me out and did all he could to make me feel better. Sometimes, when pain overwhelmed me, I would ask him what to do. Indeed, he was there for me.

Slowly but surely, the darkness began to lift, replaced by a glimmer of hope illuminating the path ahead. Though the loss would never fully fade, I knew I was not alone in my journey. 

For in the depths of my grief, I had found a companion in Christ. He was a source of strength and solace that transcended earthly pain.

 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).

Three years have passed since Nathaniel Senior left this world, but his memory lives on in the depths of my heart. And though the pain of his absence will always linger, I am reminded that even in the darkest of nights, there is always a flicker of light waiting to lead us home.

My Baby is Back!

I got pregnant again and I held my hope high. It might be another story worth sharing. But trust me, I have a bouncing baby boy. His name is Zenas Nathanael. Nathaniel means God has given. Zenas means the gift of Zeus. He is almost two years old now. So cute and cheerful. 

God wiped away my tears. This boy is just lovely and lively. He loves people and is also outgoing like his father. His laughter makes me smile, and he loves hugging me when he feels I am upset.

One day, I will tell him this story. I will teach Him to trust in the Lord. Nothing is impossible before God. Every time he calls me mum, I am reminded that mourning may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning.

To everyone grieving, just hold on and know you haven’t lost everything. God is with you even in the darkest hour. He will help you overcome that pain!

The other night I was brushing my teeth when the thought came to my mind…

Did you set your alarm?

Simple right?

Not at all.

You see, I had just prayed in gratitude to Heavenly Father that my kids could go to school the next day. I love them fiercely, but a long spring break had us all ready for a little break from each other. As some might say, we needed distance to make the heart grow fonder.

So, when the thought came to my mind to check my alarm, it meant a lot to me. I had turned my alarm off for spring break.

As I finished brushing my teeth, I realized it wasn’t my brilliance that remembered I needed to set the alarm again. It was a gift of God reminding me.

After finishing, I grabbed my phone. In great excitement, I journaled this gift from God. I wanted to remember that He answered a prayer I hadn’t even asked for. That He placed needed thoughts in my head to bless me.

As I laid down to go to sleep, I continued marveling over this. I was so happy for this little gift I was practically bouncing. (Apparently, I really needed a break.) While thinking about how God uses the gift of His Spirit to talk to us, some questions came to mind.

How often does He whisper to me? More than that… how often does He whisper to me, and I credit it to my own brilliance?

Another thought came to my mind…

A lot.

Wondering which question that answered, it was as if I could feel the warmth of a smile along with my answer…

Yes.

I couldn’t help but smile as I felt the love of a Father, patiently dealing with a child. While caught up in the moment; I received one last thought…

Did you set your alarm?

I had been so excited about the reminder that I never actually set my alarm!

Laughing at myself, I finally set my alarm. I once again thanked God. Not only could my children go to school, but God granted me the needed guidance through the gift of His Holy Ghost.

Elder Gary E. Stevenson spoke about promptings of the spirit in his October 2023 conference talk.

He told a story of a little child standing at the pulpit to bear his testimony. With his father whispering in his ear, he testified, “I am a child of God.”

The next woman to come up said, “I wish I had someone whispering in my ear like that… I do have someone whispering in my ear like that—the Holy Ghost!”

Each one of us has the power of the Holy Ghost which whispers in our ears.

It is up to us to learn and recognize when it whispers to us and whose words we are hearing.

I ask you the same questions I had to ask myself:

How often does He whisper to you?

More than that… how often does He whisper to you, and you credit it to your own brilliance?

The answers may surprise you.

1 John 4:13

Hereby know we that dwell in him, and he in us, because he hath given us of his spirit.

This past week I sat in the doctor’s office getting an x-ray for a broken toe. 

I jokingly made fun of myself for being able to break my toe by taking too big of a step.

“Getting older is hard,” I told myself.

I’m not really that old, but sitting there with my third broken toe in seven years made me feel pretty old.

The doctor believes the reason it broke so easily was partially because one of those previous breaks left my toe weakened.

I have thought lots about the doctor’s comment since then; how, over time, each injury weakens our body and makes us more susceptible.

Our spirits face the same problem.

Each year we live exposes us more to the world and away from the heaven we came from.

As we face trials, it leaves us with wounds ready to be reopened and re-injured with each further trial we face.

As we give into temptations, Satan works even harder from that moment on to get us to succumb to those same temptations again and again.

As we deal with doubt, we open ourselves to more and more doubt as more questions arise.

It seems the age old saying- time heals all wounds- might not be as true as we hoped.

Realizing this makes the commandment of enduring to the end seem like an impossible task.

How can I, can we, bear the continual weight that time adds to our spirits?

We can’t.

That is… we can’t do it on our own.

In His merciful plan, God prepared a way for us to endure all the way until the end.

He gave His Son as a sacrifice.

How can Jesus help us endure to the end?

He can keep us connected to heaven with the gift of the Holy Ghost.

By yoking our burdens to Him, He can relieve us of the load of what we are required to carry.

He can remove the sting of pain from our lives, being a balm to our soul in time of sorrow.

Christ can heal us. Through His infinite Atonement, he can take our injuries, even those self-inflicted, and heal them completely. Leaving us as strong, or stronger, than we were before. Strengthening our weaknesses to better help us stand against the fights we face during our mortal life.

Although time cannot heal all wounds, Christ can.

Christ can provide us all we need to endure to the end.

He is the ‘way, the truth, and the life; no man cometh unto the Father, but by him.’ John 14:6